Dear Rex: I'm at the end of my rope. For the last year, I've lived in New York City. I love it here but my blood pressure really starts to rise when negotiating the city's crowded sidewalks in the course of a day. I'm constantly accosted by strange men. Some say "nice" things, some not so nice but really, all comments, whether well-intentioned or not, are unwelcome. I'm going about the business of my day, what makes them think it's okay to butt in? Perhaps worst of all are those boneheads who say things like, "Hey, pretty lady, give me a smile!" Grrr... I guess what I need is a good comeback, Rex...something to put them in their places. What do you suggest? -- Belinda in the Big Apple.
Dear Belinda: Sister, I know just what you mean. How could I know, you might wonder? Well, dogs face a similar situation. In fact, it's the one complaint I encounter more than any other in letters from the canine set. I experienced it myself, back when I was a pup, not yet standing erect. Total strangers felt they had license to pet me, to scratch behind my ears, to call me "pooch" and a dozen other ridiculous names (One guy, when I was around ten, even rubbed my belly, making my leg involuntarily kick...can you believe that?). And heaven forbid I shouldn't wag my tail and act happy when being subjected to all this unwanted attention. Like women, dogs aren't allowed to have bad days, they're supposed to be ever perky, always happy to encounter a human. Blech. Thankfully, as I got older, I was able to slide over into human society, (which, of course, carries with it its own set of problems). I'd suggest you deal with these bozos much as I did all those years ago: snarl and bare your teeth. Show them you mean business and I have a feeling they'll back off.
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